SO, it snowed tuesday. horray, snow! the girls wanted to play in it once they saw their friends sliding down the hills in the front. okay, i thought. i can finish cleaning and have some quiet. i got them super warmed up in their outfits and sent them off with their sled to have some fun. after about 45 minutes, i checked outside and found that all the kids were gone. i assumed they went off to play in someone's backyard and i needed to feed wesley. so, i sat down and while feeding him i see a solo michelle walking up the steps to our house. i got her at the door and boy was she cold. i asked her where she had been and her answer was not what i wanted to hear. she said she had been out in the woods. i asked her where elise was. again, out in the woods. i asked her how she got home. she replied, all by herself. elise just left her and she managed to make her way back home. when i heard that, i LOST it. i couldn't believe my daughter would take her little sister out in the woods, in the SNOW and then expect her, a THREE year old to find her way home. i wrapped up michelle in a warm blanket, got her some hot chocolate and waited until elise had enough nerve to show up at home.and she did, and she knew she was in trouble by the look on her face. i stayed calm, had her undress and i firmly had her sit down to have "a little talk". during our conversation this is what i find out.
elise:
-i didn't want her to come with me.
-i didn't come tell you where we were going because i knew you would say no.
-i couldn't bring michelle back because i knew i would then have to tell you where we were.
-why am i always the one who gets in trouble?
-but my friends were going out into the woods. i didn't ask them to stay with me and tell them i would get in trouble for being in the woods, because i knew they would say no and go anyway.
-i'm so stupid! i always make the wrong choices! (this one really made me mad! i told her over and over that she is NOT stupid, no one in the family thinks that and that she is still learning how to make right and wrong choices.)
but yet, she knew what she was doing. she knew that she wasn't supposed to do what she did. she KNEW she would get in trouble.
i explained to her the horrible things that could have happened while out in the woods. they could have fallen into one of the streams and couldn't climb out, michelle could have gotten hurt or lost trying to make her way home, SHE could have gotten lost. and worst of all, I HAD NO IDEA WHERE THEY WERE! because they didn't tell me.
in my enraged anger, i grounded her immediately for two weeks without t.v. or playing with friends. she was crushed but understood why she had to be grounded.
now, i know that i am partially responsible for what happened. i should have wrapped up wesley and taken him crying and all out to find where they had gone. maybe, i should just have gone out and watched them. but, when can i start allowing my children the freedom and choice making to do on their own? looking back now i wonder if i was to hasty in my decision of her grounding conditions. is two weeks too long? i can't take it back now, that would make me look wishy-washy and she wouldn't take my seriously. the only thing i feel i did right in this situation was i kept my cool and didn't yell at her once. for me this is a big deal. sigh....
SOMETIMES BEING A MOM REALLY SUCKS!
so, what would you have done?
